Wednesday, September 22, 2010

You’ve been very busy lately you didn’t even notice I was watching you closely

you look at the world and suddenly you appreciate what you are having right now and then you have no choice but feel lucky and be happy.

When I was in Suwon, I walked the long road from the International Technical Cooperation Center (the place where we stayed) to the E-mart. It was a 15-20 minute walk. To get there, I had to climb an overpass. Half way through the overpass, I lingered and savored the moment. From there I could see the Suwon traffic and realized how busy life has been that sometimes I forget to stop and smell the air. It was an interesting sight, a bit different from the typical, chaotic, bustling Manila traffic. In Korea, it was all too orderly, spacious and less flurry. It rained a few hours ago so the street was wet and the air was fresh. I could have stayed there for hours but I had to buy groceries.

Yesterday, Pat, Etch and I went to the hospital to visit our godchild who has been suffering from leukemia. He’s turning 2 this October and he’s been sick since he was a baby. His mother was talking to us about his condition and all the time I was staring at my godchild and I wanted to cry. His body was covered with blisters—a manifestation that he’s suffering inside. I was thinking, all his life he has known nothing but the feeling of physical pain. I think pain is the only thing he recognized. For awhile, I sincerely wished I could have at least have half of his pain…or maybe we, the godparents, could take a piece of his pain and bear them instead of him. Geezus, he is just a child. I’ve been praying hard these days. Mr. Brightside taught me how to pray. I used to pray but it was all too selfish…it’s all about me and how to deal with my own demons. Now, it’s all about other people and their happiness.


pieterbie said...

It must indeed be pretty painful seeing your godchild suffer like that. Poor kid.

This is a very nice post, I like the photo and the accomanying text as well. It was as if a was standing next to you.

my gulch said...

Peter: yes, painful. especially if all i could do is watch. thanks for appreciating the image. Suwon, Korea is a place I could live given the choice that i had to settle abroad. it's like a more tame version of my hometown, Los Banos. :-)

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