One has to live comfortably amidst life’s misery

...whether it’s impose or a lack of choice, what matter is you maintain your stance.

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[postscript:]

I went to see “Hereafter” the other day. I’ve always been attracted to "death" as a major plot for a movie. It’s amazing how a director could turn such cliché of a topic into something that is “much more” than what it is. I was never a fan of Clint Eastwood the actor. But Clint Eastwood the director is a revelation to me. He’s a rockstar! Okay, I may have exaggerated there a bit but, you’ll be the judge.

Invictus, Changeling, Million Dollar Baby, Mystic River, Bridges of Madison Country (and now Hereafter) – I love them all!

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I was at the bookstore yesterday and I bought a book. The title? “I Can Read You Like A Book” by G. Hartley (a former army interrogator) and M. Karinch (a nonfic writer). I don’t know exactly why I bought it but suffice to say, I need to graduate from being “clueless”.

Do not, I beg you, look for anything behind phenomena

i prayed for something to happen that day. something that would break me from my routine. my way of nudging destiny and telling "hey i still exist you know! give me some boost."

i walk under the scorching heat of the sun with a humungous backpack restraining me from breathing properly. i just endured a two-hour ride of nothing but heat in a supposed to be air-conditioned bus. i was dropped off at the MRT station, definitely not my way. i had to walk the long causeway just to get where i needed to be, only to find out that i got the wrong place.

while walking the causeway, i saw her (photo above)-- a lady covered in black, sitting at the side of the busy street of Ortigas. Her arm stretched out, her head all bowed down to the ground under the beating heat of the sun, she was begging. i guess like me, she was begging destiny for some change to happen.

i rode a taxi and met my worst nightmare: a pervert driver who talked about the Virgin Mary and her miraculous works and segue into his (the driver's) sex life. such an oddball. i paid for my fare while summoning all my strength to get away. still, somewhere between my will and determination to get away, he gave me an advice: "never go to a motel with your boyfriend because something might happen".

i found the place. i found what i was looking for. but i was bothered the whole day. destiny nudged me back saying: "did i break your routine hard enough?"