just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed

Do you think you can find it?

Better than you had it...

~ One Republic

Please hear what i am not saying

You are your own exhibit. People measure you depending on how you project yourself to them. But those who knew better can dig beyond what the eyes could see. And those who knew how to “read” know that sometimes, what you say isn’t really what's inside your head. But then again, who would bother knowing the hullabaloos in your head if you yourself would not allow to be opened.

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The fallen

You fall from a height unimaginable
You wait until the earth is felt
The wind blows and you're taken to some distance
And then you wait, you wait—
Until life takes you away.

~raytsdc/@theedge/60410

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my spirit is at the ground level. never felt this low. desolation is a pain in the ass. and it doesn't help that i've been listening to corrinne may for days now. heck.

I still get affected by water lilies waiting to bloom

Even though you’re far
My sensitivity awakes
I hear you cry, cuss in anger
Unknowingly I’ve caused your pain
In your defense—
I will reserved these water lilies
In time they will bloom
to give you reprieve.

~rtdc09152009~

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[postscript]

cornborer strikes back!

We we’re chatting the other day and realized how much comfortable it is to “talk” to him over YM than talking to him personally. I am not much of a YM-user but I have more time to think as I write down my response than when we banter at each other in real situation. I am not a very spontaneous person, but I get stunned talking to him and my mind always meander every time he discusses his ideas to me —things which still surprise me ‘til today.

Anyway he added two or more adjectives to an already wealth of words which he fondly (torture-ly) calls me. No pun intended, he claims. A humble mockery to his paronomasia into practice. I had to strike back and call him “fat ass” and retorted that he needed a body tune up. I wanted to add, "Mag-diet ka kase malapit nang pumutok mga damit mo!" Kaya lang that remark goes for me too. hehe. But what I said was subtle compared to being called “sira ulo and tibo!” ("maasar pikon!"). Buti na lang di ako madaling maasar, lately.

Dreaming of sunflowers

I had a dream last night and it was all about sunflowers.

I ran through a quick literature search on the net and found this:

"To see a sunflower in your dream, symbolizes warmth, abundance, longevity, and prosperity. The sunflower also serves to point you in the right direction and is a source of spiritual guidance. Even through difficult times, you will persevere. Alternatively, the sunflower may denote haughtiness. You may be deceived by the false appearance of others. "

I would not know really but before this day ended, I found some sunshine of truthfulness in these words: "height of achievement".

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[postscript:]

A lot of things have been happening to me lately (or at least, the last few weeks). So much so that this blog could not even catch up with these "little achievements" I've been earning (ha! ang yabang ko!). Of course these "little achievements" would not come without any downside to go along with them but everything seems manageable (or so I think). Achievements and distraught pretty much complement my life. Yea, I am a walking contradiction, you might say.

My workload is a heavy shit to bear. But the weather is on my side. I've been loving the effect. And my caffeine intake is getting worst than usual.

***

I was happy to know that my brother had passed the Chief Mate Licencure Exam. We had a fight a few days before due to some unnecessary remarks. I called him a few minutes ago and congratulated him. He was happy and he was thankful that I called. I was happy too. My brother and I, we are not that close, but I love him to death. :-)

Flower arrangers

...in relation to yesterday's photo and photo cache's inquiry. :-)

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Essential yet appealed, carry all your thoughts across

An open field, when flowers gaze at you...

they're not the only ones who cry

When they see you

~from Augustana's Boston~